dialogues for cast: Kareena Kapoor

Insaan rishton se nahi, apno se anaath hota hai

Sachai ki jeet yug ki mohtaj nahi hoti

Diwali mein chaar motichoor ke laddu nahi milne wale hai ... tu yahan bonus ke khwaab dekh rahi hai

Shaadi apne liye kar rahe hai ya in logon ke liye ... haldi, mehndi, chivda, daal ... what the f*ck is happening yaar

Nasha gala banda karta hai ... par aundha effect poori family te hota hai

Aurat ke liye mard woh hota hai joh jaanta hai ki woh mard hai ... woh nahi jisse apni chaddi ke andar ki cheez par vishvas kam ho ... aur usse cheek cheekar duniya ko batana pade ... ki main mard hoon, main mard hoon, main mard hoon

Is janam mein bauji toh kya, khud Bajrangbali bhi aa jaye ... toh woh bhi mujhe tumse shaadi karne se nahi rok sakte

Hum jis raaste ko apnate hai ... woh utna hi important hai jitni hamari manzil

Dukaan khuli nahi toh saala curfew lag gaya

Nark mein hoon ... par swarg ka raasta jaanti hoon

You should never say never

Abhe aye Zandu Balm ke dhakan

Wife dil hai toh husband dhadkan ... wife diya hai toh husband Diwali ... wife zubaan hai toh husband gaali

Na hai shikwa kisi ko kisi se yahan, na hai kisi pe kisi ka zor ... jinko apna samajhte hai hum aksar, wahi nikalte hai koi aur

Yahan Melbourne mein kisi ke pass kaam ke liye time ho ya na ho ... lekin pyar ke liye yahan sabke pass time hai

Jinke table pe churi kaante ki awaaz kam aur hasne baatein karne ki awaaz zyada ho ... woh log sukhi hote hai

Jab husband wife chup chap khana kha rahe ho ... toh samjho there is trouble

Agar stuntman ko acting aati ... to woh hero nahi ban jaate

Sab ladko ko ek hi cheez mein interest hota hai

Aaj Bush ne Iraq pe do dhokle gira diye

Tum Gujarati log itne cute hote ho ... par tum log ka khana itna khatarnak kyun hota hai ... dhokla, fafda, handva, thepla ... aaise lagta hai jaise koi missiles hai

Suraj ko andha kar doon, de doon chaand ko chashme ... ladki hoon par mujhe pasand nahi duniya ki koi rasme ... kayi dilon ka mujhse hai ajab ghazab connection ... Pooja ka yahi toh hai yahi toh hai tashan

Funda zyada ho gaya na?

Aaj tak life mein ek train nahin chuti meri

Sikhni hoon main ... Bhatinda ki!

Bachpan se hi naa ... mujhe shaadi karne ka bahut craze hai, by god

Ab toh mera haath chhod do ... itni bhi sundar nahin hoon main

Jab koi pyar mein hota hai ... toh koi sahi galat nahin hota

Main apni favorite hoon

Chaand jab aadha ho jaave hai na ... toh bhi chaand hi kehlave hai

Partnership sirf profit mein hi nahi ... loss mein bhi hoti hai

Ek biwi bewafaa ho sakti hai ... ek ladki, ek premika bewafaa ho sakti hai ... par ek maa bewafaa nahi ho sakti