Jokes for Topic: General

Santa: o yar!
Me kal film dekhne theater gaya!
Wahan such much admi ko kat rahe thy
Banta: o tu konse theater gaya tha?
Santa:
“Operation Theatre”

My no. is changd. Plz note my New no. is 100, plz call me 2 comfrm. Mera naukar uthaye to 2-4 galiya de dena. Bada kamina hai, apne aap ko Police kehta hai....

Cbi Raids In Katrina’s House.

Bathroom - 20 Lacs Cash,Store Room
50 Kg Gold & Bed Room Full Of

My Photos

Sily Grl. .
Krazy About Me

boy: main iss tree pe chadu to engineering college i girls dikhegi....
girl: or tu wahan se gir gaya to medical college ki girls dikhegin.

1 Pathan Ne 1 Bachi Se Pocha
Beta Kn Se Class Mai Parti Ho ?
Bachi:Kachi Mai

Pathan:Kachi Koun Si Class Hai?
Bachi:Hamre Class Mai farsh Nahi Hai
Is Lye

Wife: Kya kar rahe ho?
Man: Makkhiya maar rha hu.
Wife: Kitni mari?
Man: 3 male aur 2 female.
Wife: Kaise malum?
Man: Kyonki 3 daru ki botal se chipki thi or 2 phone se...

Patient (Wakeel):Janab Ab Main Kya
Kha Sakta Hoon?

Doctor:Meri Fees K

Ilawa Sab Kuch Kha Saktay Hain…

santa:yar tere ghar me latrine bani hai?
banta:haan,aur tere ghar me?
santa:nai yar mere ghar me to daal chawal bana hai.

: (GHAJINI) AAMIR KHAN KI BODY ITNI JALDI KYUN BANI

KYN K AAMIR KHAN 1 BAR JIM JATA THA 15 MINT BAD BHOOL JATA THA
PHIR DUBARA CHALA JATA THA

SoN: Mom MubArik HO,Meri 7 JanmO K Liay J0b Lag GAi HAi

MOM: Acha Beta Wo KOn C?

SoN: Mujhay Star Plus KI SeriAL Me KAm MiL Gya Hai..

Santa:Jalidi 1 glass Juice dae larayi hone wali hy,1 glass penay k baad, 1 glass or dy larai honewali hy
JuiceWala:Larai kab hogi
Santa:Jab tu paisay mange ga

Santa Sharab Pikar
Sadhu Se Takra Gya

Sadhu Gusse Me-
Aye Murkh
Me Tuje
SHRAAP Deta Hu

Santa-Rukiye
Maharaj
Me Glas
Leke Ata hu

Santa throw his mobile in samundar & bola “ Aa aa upar aa”
His friend ask pani me se upar kaise aayega.
Santa bola “ Kyon nahi aayega DOLPHIN jo hai.”

Doctor patient k peche bhag raha tha.

Ek admi ne pocha kya hua?

Doctor: 4 baar aisa he hua hai sala brain ka operation karwane aata hai aur baal katwa k chala jata

Air hostess: Aap 1 gante me 4bar toilet gaye! R U OK? Kya aap ko chein nahi hai?
SARDAR: 'Chain' hai par khulti nahi hai!!!

A couple in train,
GIRL-my hand is paining...... Boy kisses her hand
after some time GIRL-my neck is paining....
BJ oy kisses her neck,
A old man ask- BHAI BAWASIR KA BHI ILAJ KARTE HO KYA?

Doctor: Bachey ko paani
dene se pehle boil kar
lena chahiye …

Sardar: Lekin Janab
Boil karne se bacha
marr toh nahi jaye ga!!

anta: Why do God stay up in heaven? Banta: Because they are afraid of what they have created!

MUSHARAF narak me yamraj se: Ek call pakistan kar lu?
yam: Ok !
call ke baad,
Mush :kitna bill hua?
Yam :kuch nahi.
Mush :kyon?
Yam : Narak 2 narak free hai...

Boy: BUS aur LARKI
aik jaisi hoti hain,
1 jaati hai to doosri aa jati hai.

Girl: RAKSHAY aur LARKAY
ek jaisay hotay hain,
1 ko bulao 4 chale aate hain

Next Generation sholay dialog-
Mom: Beta so jaa warna gabbar aa jayega..
Son: 100 rupya do warna papa ko bata dunga ki mere sone ke baad gabbar aata hai..

Boy went 2 drop AuntyA:Raat ho gai Bitu k Pas So jao B:No Anty Sofe Pe So JaungaNxt day a Sexy GIRL brng Tea B:Aap?Gal:me Bitu & UBoy:Ulu ka patha;-)

sales man:sir cokroach ke liye powder loge kya?
santa:nahi hum cokroch itna lad pyar nahi karte aaj poder dege to kal deo mangega

..

baap: beta mene tumhare liye ek ladki dhundhi hai

wo roopvati, gunvati aur sarasvati hai..

beta:lekin me kisi aur ladki se pyaar karta hu

aur wo GARBHVATI hai..

Santa visits Mysore palace. Guide: Please don’t sit there, this is Tipu Sultan’s chair. Santa: Don’t worry, I will get up when he comes.

Santa Ne Najaiz Ghar Banaya Ksi Ne Mashwara Dia
Ghar K Bahar Aisi Chowking Krdo K Police Smje Porana Ghr Hy


Santa Ne Dewar Pe Likha

Anarkali Ko Riha Kro

Agar 25 rupayee mein pav bhaji milti hai to 100 rupayee mein kya milega..

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Santa- poori bhaji

DAD :Exam me paas ho ya fail tumhe bike Dunga
SON:tank u papa
DAD: pass hua to PULSUR college jane ke liye.

Fail hua to RAJDUT Dudh bechne ke liy.

Banta to santa -tu hamesha mujhe bewakuf kyun banata hai ?
Santa- kyunki tu BANTA hai....

dhirubhai called from swarg- beta anil kaise chal raha h apna reliance india mobile ?
anil-kuch sunai nahi de raha mere airtel no. par call karo

1 Khusra Vote Mangte Hue
“Hamen Vote Do,
Mai Yakeen Dilata Hn Agar Mein Kamyab Hogya
To Phr Kisi K Haan Bhi Kaka Paida Hoa To
“Govt.”
Us K Ghar Muft Nachay Gi.

Ek buzrg apni taveel zindgi ka raaz bata raha tha.
Meri umr 80 saal hai magr main ne kbi
cigrt nhi piya,
sharab nhi pee,
joa nhi khela
aur kbi kisi aurat ki taraf aankh utha kr nhi deakha
sunne wala bola : baba g muje herat hai k phr ap itne saal kis liye zinda ho.