Jokes for Topic: Kid

aajkal ke bachche kamal hai koi dance me, koi singing me dhum macha raha hai.
hamara bachapan to chhatt pe chadh ke entina ghuma ke chillane me bit gaya....ab saaf aaya kya?

TV Serial Shayri-
1 Kutta Roz 1 Ladki Ko Milne Jata Hai,
1 Kutta Roz 1 Ladki Ko Milne Jata Hai
Ab aap Sab Hi Batao
‘YEH RISHTA KYA KEH LATA HAI

Line marne k bahut tarike h
Jinme se 3 mazedar ye h

1. Pencil se
2. Pen se
3. Marker se

Sbko apne jesa mt smjo
kuch log sharif b hote h meri tarah

Dad (caught his son watchng ‘Sheela ki jawani song’) – “Padh le beta!!
Sheela toh Exam ke baad bhi jawan hi rahegi !

Beta: Papa Mai jab business karunga to ache ache ke hath me katora pakada dunga.
Papa:Kaise?
Beta: PANI PURI bechkar.

GOLU: bulb k niche muh kholkar baitha tha
Q?
QK doctor ne kaha tha ki aaj tumhara pet kharab he esiliye jara lite khana

Choti-Choti magar Moti batein:
1 bat zindagi mein hamesha yaad rakhna

'Jab hawa chalti hai to pattay hilte hain
aur
Jab nahi chalti to nahi hilte'

It's ok.
Thanx ki koi baat nahi mere sath
raho ge to General Knowledge mein
to izafa ho ga hi.

Bahut namkeen hai vo jise hum chahte hai,
.
.
Har pal khuda se usi ko mangte hai,
.
.
Dil tarasta hai use paane ko,
.
.
Kya aapka dil nahi karta.........
.
.
.KURKURE khaane k0 ?

Jis chehre ko dekh kar haste the hum, aaj usine 'Rula diya' khud ne to phone kiya nai
humne kiya to
.
.
.
.
.
Caller tune,'Tujhe Bhula Diya'???;

Teacher: What is the difference between Himami and Tsunami...
Tinto: Himami is face wash... Tsunami is is total wash

DuriYon ki na parvah kijiye,
Dil jab b pukare bula lijiye,
Hum dur nahi zyada aapse
.
.
Bas ek bottle
MAAZA
Aur
5 Samose taaza
Mangwa lijiye..!

honton tak bahkar aayi.....
Naak ko ek hi baar me surarrr kar ke wapas khich lene ka talent
Sirf bhartiya bacho me paya jata hai

Height of intelligence
Madam : Wat came 1st Sun or Moon?
Natkhatlal - Obviosly Moon..
madam: How?
Natkhatlal : Madam ji Honey'moon' hoga tabhi to 'Son' ayega na !

Preeto pappu ko peet rahe the.
Santa kyon peet rahe ho pappu ko? Preeto school men janmashtami ke uplaksh me 'Radha' par
nibndh likhane ko kahaa gaya tha. Santa to fir? Preeto- kamabakht ne 'Raadhe Maa' par nibndh likh dala.

MOLU-Tumara Bhai Gora hai Per tum kale kyun ho
.
GOLU :Qki mai raat me paida hua tha jabki mera bhai din me

Teacher-A B C D Sunao
Papu- A B C D E F G H I J K L N O Q R S T U V W X Y Z
Teacher- P M kaha gaya?
Papu- Foreign Tour pe

Golu : Mom kya aapne mujhe paida hone se pehle dekha tha?
Mom : Nahi to beta!
Golu : To phir paida hone ke baad aapne mujhe pehchana kaise??

Jese detergent ke ads me chote beche kapre gande kar ke
ghar aa jate hai
bechpan me hum aa jaya karte the to kapre baad me dulte the
pehele mummy ke maar se hum dhul jaya karte the

Apple iPhone 6 launched in India at Rs. 53,500.00
mene papa ko kaha papa mughe iPhone 6 chiye.
Papa ne kaha- beta etne me to 1 bike+5 months ka petrol aa jayega
Mene moka pe choka mara - accha papa to wahe khrid do
Papa Shocked but me Rock........

Pappu bahut speed me Car chala raha tha
to trffic police ne use pakad liya
Pappu- Sir, Mai car chalana sikh raha hu
Police- Bina kisi Teacher ke?
Pappu- jee wo mai'Correspondence Course' kar raha hu na

Pappu : Sir Humara Poty Aaya Hai.
Math Teacher : To Main Kya Karu?
Toilet Chala Jaa.
Pappu : Up Galat Samajhra Sir,
Humara Answer Poty (40) Aaya Hai.

** Attention ** ** Attention **
please...'Lifebuoy'Se Mat Nahaya karo,
.
.
Suna hai Ye 'keedo' ko Maarta Hai..
.
.
OR hum 'Apko'KHONA Nahi Chahte.

Premika: Main maa banne wali hoon,
Premi: Kya bakwas kar rahi ho..
Premika: Bakwas nahi, main tumhare papa se shaadi kar ke tumhari maa banne wali hoo.

Beta- Papa app ki shaadi majburi me hue hai?
Papa- hai, par Tumko kese pata?
Beta- Kyoki aap ki shaadi aur mere Date of Birth me sirf 6 mahine ka phark hai.k

Teacher : छोटी मधुमक्ख़ी तुम्हें क्या देती है ?
.
पप्पू : “Honey”
.
Teacher : And पतली बकरी ?
.
पप्पू : “Milk”
.
Teacher : और मोटी भैंस ?
.
पप्पू : “Home Work”
.
.
ले लप्पड़… दे… थप्पड़

Hight of Intolerance
कहीं पुरानी प्रेमिका मिल जाये और
उसका बच्चा पूछे – “मम्मी ये कौन है ?”
.
प्रेमिका कहे – “बेटा… ये तुम्हारे मामाजी है, नमस्ते करो…”
? ? ?

इतना संस्कार वाला कलयुग है कि…
लड़की की विदाई के वक्त मां-बाप से ज्यादा तो
मोहल्ले के लड़के रो देते हैं…
? ? ?

हम गए थे उसके घर Red Roses ले कर ये कहने कि –
“तू आपन दिल हमरा के देबू का ?”
.
पर उसकी मम्मी ने खोला दरवाजा और हम घबरा के बोले…
“ए चाची… दूई रुपया में गुलाब का फूल लेबू का?”
? ? ?

जब चाइन में बच्चा पैदा होता है….
तो वो माँ या बाप पर नहीं…
बल्कि…
पूरे चीन पर जाता है…
????
ये है सच्ची देशभक्ति…
? ? ?

गुरुजी - पप्पू ,बताओ अस्पताल में जो + चिन्ह हो़ता है
उसका क्या मतलब है?

पप्पू - गुरुजी, जो खड़ा है
वो डॉक्टर और
जो आड़ा है वो पेशंट..

गुरूजी ICU में..

One day, a pregnant woman, while strolling through a park with her 3 year old daughter, gets a question.

Daughter: Mother what happened to your stomach?

Woman: Munni, it's your sister inside.

Duughter: Do you love her very much?

Woman: Yes, very much.

Daughter: Then, why the hell did you eat her???

Master To Student:
A B C D Se Shuru Honay Wale Alphabets Se Sentence Banao.?

Student:

A=Apni
B=Beti ka
C=Cell Number
D=Dijiye