Jokes for Topic: Male

4 shraabi 1 janaze ko uthakr jaldi jaldi kabro k upr se ja rahe the,
Kisi ne kha-'Oye sharm kro niche Murde h'
SHRABI-To upr konsa humne WORLD CUP utha rkha h.!

Dad- Whos this girl ??

Boy- ohh she, My girlfriend
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next day




Dad- now whos this 'new' girl?

Boy-Rishta wohi Item Nayee.....

Prito: Mere hont bahut phat gaye hai, kuch lagane ke liye la dena

Santa: lo tumhare phate hoton ko jorane ke liye Fevicoal laya hun

santa : oye humne chokidar ko nikal diya
banta : kyu?
santa : sala chokidar wo tha aur rat hum pe chillata ' Jagte Raho'

Santa gets a msg-
'kya aap Anna Hazaare ke saath hai?'
Santa replies
'Nahi main taan ghare haan...kuch kamm si??'

Mazak ki bhi ek Hadd hoti hai YAAR

Main Ladki ke sath date maar raha tha aur mera dost uske samne aakar bola:
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'kal wali Zyada achi thi'...

Santa Banta ki khub pitai huyi.
Par Q?
Qki
Dono B'Day party
me muft ka khana
khate pakde Gye
aur
kehne lage:Hum
Ladki walo k taraf-
se hai

cycle wale ne 1 Aadmi ko takkar mar di.
Aur bola-Aap bahut lucky ho
Aadmi- kaise
Cycle wala- Aaj meri chutti hai
NAHI TO MAI TRUCK CHALATA HU

Boy-Cn i Hold ur Hand?
Grl-No!
Boy-Y?
Gal-cz it Hurts whn u Leave it.

Boy-Ma kasam,
Humari Acting!
To Ladkiyo ki Over Acting

Circuit: Bhai america mein address puchega tho kya bolne ka
Munna: Dhobhi Ghaat
Circuit: Bhai english mein bolneka tho?
Munna: Washington

Santa: shirt silwane k liye 1 achha kapda dikhao.
Salesman: plain me dikhau?
Santa: nahi helicopter me dikha saale bandar yahi pe dikha,,,:-,

Pathan Student:
Miss kya raat ko aap mujhe Call kar rahi thi?
Miss:
No
Pathan Student:
Kamal hai
subha mere Mobile pe likha tha: (MISS Call)

Santa- oye yaar! Tu mujhe sms 2-2 baar kyu bhejta hai..?
Banta- oye! Ek sms tu rakh liya kar aur ek forward kar diya kar.

athan Ne Apni Biwi Ko Goli Maar Di,,,
Kyun Ke Usne Sirf Itna Kaha Tha Ke
Mein Apni Zindagi,,
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'Shan' Aur 'Shoukat' Ke Sath Guzarna Chahti Hon..!! =P

Ek kanjus ko electric current Laga..

Uski wife:
Aap theek toh ho na?

Kanjus:
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Mai theek hu..
tu meter dekh, UNIT kitne badhe..??

1 boy ladki ko impress krne ke chakkar me bike se gir pada...
girl:Ooh! Aapko kahin chot to nhi lagi?
Boy : Hat pagli! Hum to gaadi se aise hi utarte hain...!!

Santa nahi sudhrega:
policeman:
sab sach bata varna chaddi uttar k marunga.
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Santa: saab galti Maine ki hai aap kyun chaddi uttaro gey.
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Koi samjhao yaar

Girl (in train) :- can i sit here ?

Boy :- it all urs .........

Girl :- can i take some water ?

Boy :- my pleasure ............

Girl :- Bhaiya agla station kaun sa hai ?
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Boy :- mere baap ne mere dimag me koi GPS fit nhi kiya hai ,
jaldi seat khali ker mujhe neend aa rahi hai ........

ek dost ne dosre dost se pocha: sonu, kya tere papa ko tere cigarette ki adat ki bare main pata hai? to dost ne kaha: aray yaar cigarette ki bare main tu pata nahi magar mere charas ki bare main usko pata hai

Police:
Hame Aap K Ghar Ki Talashi Leni Hy,
Pata Chala Hy K Aap K Ghar Mai Koi Dehshat Gard Hy.
Husband:
Khabar To Pakki Hy,
Per Abhi WOH Maikay Gai Hui Hy....

Bhakt: Baba mein dukhi hu.
NIRMAL BABA: Aap ke pas SmsJokes4u ke sms aate hai.
Bhakt: Haanji
Baba: Reply karte ho
Bhakt: Nahi
Baba: Roj reply karo..
Kripa aani shuru ho jaygi.

Teacher: Kutta Dum kuyn halata hai ?
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Santa: Sir Kuyn K Dum Kuttay ko nahi hilla sakti

Uncle: Kya Kar Rahe Ho Beta Aaj Kal..??
Boy: Ji EnGineering
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Uncle: Ohh.. Humko Laga Padhai-Wadhai Karte Hoge.

Ek bar NARADJI ne kuch aisa dekha ki wo behosh ho gaye..

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Taakat pane k liye..

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Hanumanji 'RAJNIKANT CHALISA' padh rahe the.

Santa Walking On Road
Samne Gobar Pada Tha
Santa Ne Jhuk Kar Ungli Dal Kar Taste Kia Aur Bola:
Oh!
Ye To Gobar H,Shukr Hai Mera Pair Nai Pada

Santa: 1 aurat ko ghurte hue ja raha tha,
Aurat:'dekhta kya h teri maa ki umar ki hu'
Santa: to mai bhi apne baap k liye hi dhund raha hu...!

santa ne college me ladki se i luv u kaha...ladki ne chanta mara or boli kya bola tu..santa -rote hue jab suna nahi to chanta kyun mara..

Sonu-Yaar,English Me 'Jhopdi' Ko Kya Kehte He

Monu-Hutt

Sonu-Abe,English Aati Nhi To Saaf Saaf Bol Na..hutt hutt kaya bol rahee..

PLATFORM se ladki ne utar kar ladke se pucha ki konsa station he???

ladka: no. dogi to bataunga....

ladki: oh,ho mumbai aa gaya....

Dad: ek zamana tha jab main Rs 10/- mein kirana, sabzi, doodh, nashta le aata tha
Beta: ab aisa possible nahi papa kyunki sab jagah CCTV camere lage hote hain!.

Mummy : Tu Hamesha TV Kyun
Dekhta Rehta Hai.. ?
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Kid : To Kya Fridge Dekhu..Maa ????

Pappu salo k baad santa se mila..

Pata chala dono ki shadi ho gai hai..

Santa:- Kaisi hai teri biwi.

Pappu: Swarg ki apsara hai.,

Aur teri..????

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Santa:- Meri to abhi jinda hai.!!.;) :P