dialogues for cast:

Joh akela khelta hai, woh team ke khilaf khelta hai

Duniya ka sabse aasan kaam hota hai kisi par ilzaam lagana ... aur sabse mushkil kaam sachai kuredna

Kabootar gaya bar mein whiskey peeke leta ... tu agar apni maa ko yahan se leke gaya toh bahut pitega beta

Jab baap beta razi ... toh khulegi aaj Yamazaki

Dabake rakhna theek nahi hai ... na emotion, na motion

Jaise ek ajeeb sa caterpillar beautiful butterfly ban jaata hai ... biwiyon ka ulta hai ... woh butterfly se caterpillar ban jaati hai

Shaadi vagaira na bahut mushkil cheez hoti hai ... vegetarian sherni ke gufa mein rehne jaisi mushkil ... woh tumhe khayegi nahi kyun ki woh vegetarian hai ... lekin darati rehegi dahaadein maar maar ke ... oow, oow

Itna bhajan kirtan teri maa karti hai na ... toh mujhe darr hai ek din bhagwan khud prakat honge aur request karenge ... please yeh chamach dholak bajana band karo ... dev lok mein log soo nahi paa rahe hai

Jab baap bete ke dole shole same ho jaye na ... toh woh dost ban jaate hai

Aaj ka andhera bahut gehra aane wala hai ... aur khamoshi kaan phaad

Criminal ko arrest karke case khatam hota hai ... criminal nahi ... woh kabhi na kabhi dushman bankar phir vapas lautta hai

Aaj ke zamane mein mard hona hi ek tragedy hai, tragedy ... apne mummy ke saamne wife se pyar se baat karo toh joru ka ghulam ... wife ke saamne mummy se pyar se baat karo toh maa ke pallu se banda hua ... apne bachon ko maaro toh nirdayi ... aur kuch na kaho toh laparwah ... poore din ghar ke bahar raho toh aawara .. ghar ke andar behto toh naakara ... apni Mrs. se job na karao toh shakki ... aur karvao toh biwi ki kamai khane wala ... yehi ladies ko by mistake haath bhi lag jaye toh hum zalim ... aur yehi ladies apunko peete toh hum nalle

Jab sher jungle mein shikaar karta hai ... toh pehle woh khud khata hai ... phir usse geedad aur giddh khate hai ... aur joh kuch bacha kucha hota hai usse zameen ke keede makaude khate hai ... aur meri nazar mein teri aukaat keede makaude ki bhi nahi hai

Gusse mein liya hua decision hamesha nuksaan pahunchata hai ... is liye pehle maine decision liya and now I'm getting angry, very angry

Itihaas ki ek bahut buri aadat hai ... yeh hamesha apne aapko daurata hai

Main Mohammed Rafi toh nahi ban saka ... lekin tereko Lata Mangeshkar zaroor banaunga

Sapno ke saath do hi baatein hoti hai ... ya toh poore hote hai, ya toot jaate hai

Agar tum dono ne pehle din hi jhoote pati ka patta pehan liya na ... toh sari zindagi bow-bow bhi karte rahoge na ... toh meow-meow hi sunai dena hai

Agar tum logon ka pyar sacha hai toh woh zaroor madad karega ... woh joh soote huye parindon ko pedh se neeche nahi girne deta ... woh apne bandon ko besahara kaise chhodega

Mooh se awaaz nikaali toh body se jaan nikaal doonga

Aaj tak hum log shareef nahi ho paaye ... yeh kya ghanta hoga!

Aapki sharafat ke chakkar mein main kayde mein hoon ... varna ab tak mere khud ke do char Al-Qaiday hote

Bachpan se bhaag hi raha hoon ... pehle school se bhaaga ... bhook lagi toh roti churakar bhaaga ... bhai bana toh police se bachkar bhaaga ... jahan behetna tha wahan bhaaga, jahan chalna tha wahan bhaaga ... jahan bhaagna tha wahan kutte ke maafit bhaag hi raha hoon ... apun ki aakhi life bhaagne mein hi nikal gayi

Logon ki maa-behan hoti hai ... aapki baap-behen ho gayi hai

Jab baat ek shareef aadmi ki izzat ki aati hai na ... toh usse bada gunda koi nahi hota

Aye chalte huye gas ke gubbare

Khel mein toh haar jeet lagi rehti hai ... afsoos woh karte hai jinka khel khatam ho gaya ho

Saand kitna bhi akela kyun na ho ... uski hifazat karne ke liye aaju baju baand zaroor rehte hai

Jeete ji tune kanoon ki itni thukai ki hai ... ki aaj tujhe khuda ki khudai bhi nahi bacha sakti

Kuch log ithihaas padhte hai kuch padhaate hai ... lekin hum ithihaas banane jaa rahe hai

Tum galat karoge, hum rokenge ... tum gunaah karoge, hum thokenge

Police ki goli mein itna loha hai, ek baar thokdi na ... toh zindagi bhar tere khoon mein iron ki kami nahi hogi