Jokes | चुटकुले

Lalu Prasad Yadav ka funny beta 1000 Watt ke bulb par Lalu Yadav ka naam likh raha tha.

Lalu Yadav: Bitwa, e ka kart ho?

Funny Beta: Aapka naam roshan kar raha ho

Train me laloo ne apna trunk upar samaan rakhne vali jagah par rakh diya. Neeche Mayavati baithi thi.

Mayawati: Lalooji, apna samman kahi or rakho, mere sirr pe gir jaega.

Funny Lalu: Koi baat nahi behanji, iss me tutne vali koi cheez nahi hai.

Mayawati apne friend Lalu ke ghar GOAT le ke jati hai..

Lalu: E Bhaiswa ko kyun Layi ho ?

Mayawati: Dikhta nahi, Goatwa hai

Funny Lalu: Hum Goatwa se hi Puch raha Hun..!!

Ik bar Laloo ji sykil chala rahe the, ke achanak sykil Ik girl se takra gayi

Girl shouted: Sala ghanti nahi maar sakta tha!

Funny Laloo: Behanji, poori sykil to maar di, ab ghanti alag se maroon ?

Funny Laloo ji 18 guards ko le kar film dekhne jate hain. Pucho to kiyun?

Because below 18 was not allowed.

Barkha Dutt: Laloo Ji, hamare desh mein divorce ke cases badte hi ja rahe hain. Aapko kya sochte ho, iska main karan kya hai.

Funny Laloo: Shaadi.

enge.”

Laloo: Beta ye kaisi machis laaye ho. Sasura ek bhi teeli nahi jal rahi.

Funny Son: Kya baat kartay ho papa sab ki sab check kar kay laya hoon.

Lawyer to Lalu: 'Gita pe haath rakhkar kaho ke...... '

Funny Lalu : 'Yeh kya, Sita pe haath lagaya to court mein Bulaya. Ab fir Gita pe haath!!'

Patni Gusse Me- Aaj Ke Baad Mai
Tumse Baat Nahi Karungi
Jatt- Kyu Tum Gungi Hone Wali Ho
Patni- Nahi,Tumhe Behra Karne Wali Hu

TEACHER to Jatt:Tumhare Papa kya karte hai?

Jatt-Jo meri MUMMY kehti hai wo..

Dost-Tum to kaha Rahe The Ki Mai cement ki factory
Banauga to abhi tak banaya nai
Jatt-Kya karu Factory banay k liyae Cement hi
nahi mil raha

Jatt Cricket Khel Kar Aaya
Dost-Kitne Runs Banae
Jatt-Century Hone Me 100 Runs Baqi The
Mai Out Ho Gya

Jatt-Yar Mai bohat preshan hu..
Dipu-Kyun Kya Huwa..?
Jatt-Yaar subah se hum ko koi battery low k number se miss call de raha hai

Girl (romantically) to Jatt: 1 chutki sindoor ki keemat tum kya jano?

Jatt: 0.00078924576 Rs. per gram.
Don`t mess with Jatt!

Dulhan Andhe Jatt Pati Se=Kash Tumhari Ankhe Hoti To Tum Mere Husn ko Dekh skte

Jatt=Agr Tum Khubsurat Hoti To Kya Ankho wale Tumhe Mere Liye Chhod Dete.

1baar Jatt paise jama krne Bank gya

Officr-Ye note fata h dusra do

Jatt-Me apne Accont me jama kr raha hu, fata hua karu ya Nya Tuje kya matlab h bey?...

att k 12 bachon mein 1 alag dikhta tha:

Jab uski biwi marnay wali thi to Jatt ne poocha: Ab to bata do ye kis ka hai?

Jatt ki patni: Sartaj, sirf yehi aapka hai.

Jatt: Ghar mai Mera he Hukam chalta hai.
Mai Kehta hon, Garam paani le aao, woh le aati hai,

Dost: Garam pani Q?

Jatt: Garam pani se Bartan Achay Dhultay hain.

Jatt on phone:
Doctor my wife is pergnant.She is having pain right now.
Doctor: Is this her first child?
Jatt: No this is her husband speaking‚¦

Jatt : Yar meri biwi pani se bohat darti hai.
Friend : Acha wo kaise?
Sardar : Yar kal mein ghar gaya to wo bathtub mai bhi security guard k sath bethi thi.!!

Jatt saw a very high Airtel Tower
& red light glowing on the top,
seeing this he said €India is developing fast,
see there are traffic signals for Aeroplane in the air

Jatt Kisi Larki Ghar Rishta Ly Kar Gya

Larki K Maa Baap Bole Humari Beti
Abhi Parh Rahi Hai…

Jatt:Koi Bat Nhe Hum
Ek Ghante Baad A Jauengy.

Jatt Was Awarded 2010 Nobel Prize
For His New
“Theory Of Motion”

Which States:

“Loose Motion Can Never Be Done In Slow Motion.”

Jatt’s Father
brought a
NEW SIM CARD..

Jatt saved that
…Number in his Mobile Phone
as,
.

.

.

“New Father”

Jatt In Computer Exam
Examiner
“What Is Microsoft Excel?”
Jatt : “It Is A New Brand Of Surf Excel To Clean The Computer

Jatt: Tumhara Shop Ka Doodh Kharab Hai
Shrbat Me Dala Pht Gya
Dudh Wale Ne Pocha
Konse Sharbat May Dala Tha?
Jatt : LIMOO PANI Me..!

Jatt:
Oye Yara Machli Khaega?

Baniya:
Nahi Yaar Us me Kaante Hote Hain.

Jatt:
Oye Chhor Yaar,
Chappal Pehen K Kha Lena….

Jatt Bache Ke Report Lene Hospital Gya
Report Bohat Kharab Thi
.
.
Jatt Bache Se Bola
“Oy School Te School…
Tenu Ethey V Meri Izat Da Koi Kheyal Nai.

Air hostess: Sir kya loge?
Jatt: Milk Badam, Kheer, Bread Pakora n Tandoori Chicken wid Naan..
Airhostess: Sir tusi jahaaz te aaye ho,.
Apne PYO DE VYAAH te nhi!.

Agar Marvadi Girls Papita beche to Hum Ladko ko Bhot Fayda hoga.
?

Kyuki Ladkio ko ye aawaz lagani Hogi-
Pappi to le lo
Pappi to le lo

1 Dafa 1 Chor Ne Apni Mangetar Ko Sonay Ka Set
Dia.

Mangetar Ne Khush Ho K Pocha Is Ki Keemat Kia H

Chor:Teen Sal ki Qaid

Kanjus-KajuKatli Aur Lijiye Na
Mehman-Nai Shukriya Me Pehle Hi 4 Le Chuka Hu
Kanjus-Li To Apne Waise 6 He,Lekin Kher Yaha Kaun Gin Raha He.