dialogues for cast:

Hum bade professional log hai ... kaam kare ya na kare, payment poori lete hai

Pyar mein hai na jhagde joh hote hai woh nasdeekiyon ki nishani hote hai

The power of people is always stronger than the people in power

Aapke dushman pe humne aisi dushmani nikali hai ... ki agar woh dushman bhi apne dushman ko dekh le na ... toh woh apni dushmani bhoolke us dushman pe taras khane lagega

Hum log science mein maante hai ... non-science mein nahi

Jeb mein zara sa chhed ho jaaye na ... toh sikkon se pehle rishtey gir jaate hai

Yeh jayegi toh koi aur aayegi ... woh jayegi toh koi aur aayegi ... kalaiyon ki kami hai kya hamare desh mein

Yaadien bhi kitni ehsaan faramosh hoti hai na ... jis dil mein rehti hai ussi dil ko dukhati hai

Thoda thoda karenge ... pura nahi karenge ... upar upar se

Berozgar pati ko kaam ke liye utsana chahiye ... kamasutra ke liye nahi

When I'm high ... I don't lie

Mutthi mein band hai maut ka khel ... dekh raha hai tujhe aasmaan se sohail

Har ladki hai na apne hone wale mein father figure dhoondti hai ... figure uske paas hai, father tu hai

Subah subah jab koi bole mujhe apna bana lo ... toh samajh jao ki waqt aa gaya hai ki Godrej hair dye kholo, gholo aur laga lo

Saale pichwaade pe itni goliyan padegi na ... roti bhi pet ke bal letke khani padegi

Pichwaade mein dum nahi aur hum kisi se kam nahi

Aaj zindagi mein pehli baar main tay nahi kar pa riha hoon ... ki main deke aariya hoon ke leke aariya hoon

Pehle bhi dekha hai ishq mein andha bawla hote ... par chutiya pehli baar dekhriya hoon main

Pichwade mein itni goli maroonga ... ki uske bachche pittal ke paida honge

Shaadi saath janamon ka bandhan hota hai ... maine toh apni galatiyon ka quota aadhe janam mein hi poora kar diya ... bas ab baki ke sade-che janam sirf tumhe pyar dena chahta hoon

Mard hai na ek aurat ke saath bore ho jaata hai ... aurat bore nahi hoti ... aur jab mard bore ho jaata hai toh uske joh hormones hai na usko attack karne lagte hai

Hormones ko koi farak nahi padta aadmi hai ya aurat hai ... discrimination na tum jaise log karte ho society mein

Kaan ke neeche kheench ke doonga na ... agli saath pushtein teri saali behri pehda hongi

Madam yeh Meerut hai ... yahan ke laundon ko na ek hi tarah ki boyfriendi aati hai ... thoko, peeto aur khisko

Meerut ka hoon ... apni aukaat pe aa gaya na, toh gand ka Gurgaon bana doonga

Sutli bomb hai yeh ... desi tamancha

Tumhara ishq, ishq ... aur humara ishq, sex

Main apna atmasaman girake ... yeh samaan nahi uthaonga

Upar waala bhi aapse do yah teen din hi bada hoga

Abe jaldi bol ... picture khatam ho jayegi

Uncle aunty ki shaadi ... sunne mein kitna odd lagta hai

Tumhare paas college hai toh mere paas knowledge hai