Jokes for Topic: Male Female

MODERN BEIZZATI...
Boy- i luv u
girl- apni shakal dekhi hai kya?
boy- dekhi hai tabhi to tere pas aaya warna KATRINA KAIF K pas na jata

Santa Yaar mE 2 mushkilon me Fass gya hu
Banta: Wo koun si?
S:Biwi makeup kre to kharcha bardasht nhi hota
aur na kare to biwi bardasht nahi hoti

WIFE Night Me Pati Se- MERI TARAF FACE KAR K SO
JAO NA,
MUZE DARR LAG RAHA HAI...

HUSBAND- AACHA AUR MAI BHALE HE DAR KE MARE MAR
JAU..
;)

Boy-Tum Ldkiya Itni Khubsurat Q Hoti Ho?
Girl-Qki, God Ne Hmko Apne Hath Se Bnaya H
Boy-Bol To Aise Rahi H Jaise ki Hme To Mistri ko Diya Tha Theke Pe.

TCHER:Agar dunya ki saAri Aurton ka chehra 1 jesa hota to kya hota?

SANTA:Hona kya tha sir?

Gas Cylinder ki tarah aaj iske ghar kal uske ghar.:P

Santa apni biwi ko maar raha tha..
ek admi ne pucha kyu maar rahe ho ??

Santa : Docter ne kaha hai, isko dawai koot ke deni hai

Technology Impact:

Year 2050 Mein Pita Gusse Mein Apne Nursery Ke Bache Se:
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Mene Tumhe Hazaro Baar Bataya Hai…..
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Ki Tum Vastav Mein
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Paida Hue The Na Ki Download…

Boy : may I kiss u?
Girl : No
Boy again : May I kiss u?
Girl : No.. Boy desperately
asks :
PLEASEEEEE
MAY I KISS U?
Girl : Kutte, kaminey...
Teacher thodi naa hoon jo permission maang raha hai ZABARDASTI nahin Kar sakta kya ?

Ek murgi aur uske 3 bache road cross kar rahe the.
Road cross karne k baad murgik 1 bache ne kaha,hum saato ne road cross karli.

7 kaise?
?
?
?
Socho,




Aur socho,

read msg again,
than scroll down,


Arey yaar,bache hai kuch b bolte rehte hai..

aap tension mat lo..

Height of Torture !!!


Bf-aaj i am very tensed, mood kharab hai, sirr bhi dukh raha hai...
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Gf-hmmm!!!
Acha wo sab chodo,ye dekho!!

mera naya purse!!!...

Larki ka Baap Larki se..
Jisse tum pasand karti ho
Uske Paas Bangla, Gaari, Jaayedad to hai na?

Larki: Tauba Hay..
Saare Mard Ek Jaise Hote hain..
Wo bhi Aapke Bare mein Yehi Pooch raha tha!!

Boy: Can i have a bite of ur dairy milk?
Girl: Kya main apko janti hu.
Boy: Jaldi de de behen Samosa khake aaya hu.
mirchi lagi hai
drame baad mein kar liyo.

Biwi ne Board dekha
Banarsi Saree Rs10
Naylon saree 8/-
Cotton saree 5/-
Wife: mujhe 500
rs do me 50 saree
khridungi
Pati-Surdas ki Ma
ye LAUNDRY ki dukan h

Boy (kamina) ne 1 ladki ko call ki..

Boy - Hello Jan I love U..

Ladki - Sachi..

Boy - Really..

Ladki (maha kamini) - Jaanu 100 ka recharge karwo do plz...

Boy - Sorry behen wrong number..

BF & GF dono hans rahe the tabhi BF achanak se chup ho jata h
GF:kya hua?
BF:kuch ni
GF:batao na kuch to hua?
BF:wo hanstey hanstey meri thodi si potti nikal gayi

Girlfriend- Apke bina mera ZEE nahi lagta
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Santa- ZEE nahi lagta to isme kya hai SONY ya STAR PLUS laga lo wo bhi achhe channel hai...

Grl- ? mere piche apni Zindgi Barbad mt kr ?
Boy- ? Q? ?
Grl- ? is Raste pe Patthr or Kanto k Alwa kuch nhi ?

Boy- ? Are Pagli......... ? mere Pas WOODLAND k Shoes He na bs tu pat ja naa.......!! ?

Kidnaper: Teri biwi mere
kabze me hai saboot ke taur par uski do ungliya bhijwa raha hoon
santa:sabut pakka nahi hai
.

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Mundi bhej mundi.

After breakup:-
Girl - Kamine maine jo wallet,watch, deo, tshrt, jeans, belts, shoes diye thae sab wapas kar !
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Boy-Tu petrol wapis kar
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.Girl - kya me apne janu se mazak bhi nahi kar shakti

Apni Girlfrnd ke samne dusri ladkiyo ko kaise dekhe?


Boy: Tum ne us ladki ko
dekha....Wo Kapde usko bilkul
suit nehi karte.....
Girl: Saale.... Tu toh
chahta hai k
ladkiyan kapde hi na
pehne !!

Moral: Ladki Ne Pehle Hi
Sprite Pee li thi

pati na kajre ki dhar na motiyo ki har na tumne kiya koi singaar fir bhi kitni sundar ho tum kitni sundar ho patni kamine saaf bol na ki mekup ke liye paise nahin dunga

Boy: Suno jara !


GIRL: Chup raho, Khate time baat nahi karte,



Khane k baad


Ladki: Ab bolo

Boy: Teri plate me cockroch tha,
Le aur ban Heroine.

GirL to another girl: 'You are beautiful''
Other girl: 'Thank you, you are beautiful too'
&
BOY to another boy: 'You are handsome'
Other boy: 'Tu Gay to nahi hai na saale?'

Boy sends friend request to Girl
on Facebook :-
Girl :- Kaunn ho tum ?
Boy :- Hasrat tumhari .......
Girl :- Chahte kya ho ?
Boy : Mohhabat tumhari ...... ...
Girl:- Pachtaoge tum ..........
Boy :- Kismat hamari .........
Girl :- Married hoon main ......
Boy: To Status single se hata
Manhoos Naari .

Boy Ne ek
Girl Ko
Propose Kia....
Girl Ne Mana Kar Diya.... .
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Boy : i'll wait ..
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30 Din tak Tere Ghar k Niche Khada Rahunga.. . .
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30th Din k baad Girl Boli -I Love u.... . .
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Boy : .
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Rehne De !! Ab Teri Padosan
Set Ho Gayi Hai.....!!!

A little Boy says to a Girl:
:I LOVE U:
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But
she says k wo kisi or ko chati hai.
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the little boy looks down in sad
mood..
&
After few seconds looks up..
&
eyes Filled with tears and emotes
all his feeling by saying just a
single & most beautiful word ever:
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KAmIniii

Wife ne santa ko SMS kiya
Kitni der me Aa rhe ho?

santa ne Jawab me SMS kiya

20-25 mint me Aa rha hu,

Agr Der ho jaye to ye

SMS fir se Padh lena

Bf on call- Hey Swtheart Kya Kr Rahi Ho. . ?
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Gf Meri Tabiyat Kharaab H Janu,
Sone Ja Rahi Hu or
Tum . ? .
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Bf- Me Cinema Hall Me Tere Piche Baitha hu
KAMINI . .

Girl- mere b'day par bahut costly gift dena.
Boy-ok.

on the b'day.....
Boy- your gift....
Girl- how sweet!!!!!:):).
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is mein kya hai.............?????

Boy- petrol mein tale paneer ke
pakore...!!!!!

Boy (politely): hi...

Girl (showing atitude): do I know u?
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Boy (in cool tone): nahi re pagli. Teri itni aukaat kaha.

Girl: McDonald’s chale...?
Boy: Spelling bolo to hi jayenge.
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Girl: 1 kam karo KFC chalte h...
Boy: KFC ka Fullform bolo
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Girl: Rehne de kamine, samosa hi khila de....

Toofani Raat.

Girl: Come on dear get in to my umbrella.
Boy: Its ok sister thanx &
runs away..

Moral: Moral woral kuch nahi.
Ladki k paon ulte the..