dialogues for cast:

Sari zindagi kai tasveerein seene se lagayi rakhi ... kabhi khud ki tasveer yaad nahi rakhi

Ek ladki joh chhat se apne papa ko dhakel de, usse ka kehte hai batao? ... push-paa!

Moongphali mein chilke aur laundiya mein nakhre na hote ... toh zindagi kitni aasaan hoti

Laundiya ko ghumana ho, jeb mein haath daalo note nikal aata hai ... laundiya ko gol-gappa khilana ho, jeb mein haath daalo note nikal aayega ... laundiya ko cinema dikhana ho, jeb mein haath daalo ... kya nikal aata hai? ... (note) ... lekin jab jeb phatti hogi, us mein haath daloge toh kya nikaloge ... ghanta!

Is duniya ka har ladka bachkana hai, har ladki insecure hai aur hum sab real life mein cheezy hai

Ladka ladki bhaagkar gale milte hai, toh milne de ... slow motion hone de, sunset hone de, gaane bajhte hai toh bajhne de ... main toh kehta hoon ki dono puppy lete hai toh lene de

Tum log suno-gay ... toh hairan ho jao-gay ... pata nahi kya socho-gay ... kya samajho-gay ... aur mere liye kya kaho-gay

Bahut samajh samajhke samajh mein aaya hai ... ki pyar ko sirf pyar hi samajh sakta hai

Samajh samajhke samajh ko samajho ... samajh samajhna bhi samajh hai ... samajh samajhke joh na samajhe meri samajh mein woh nasamajh hai ... aye nasamajh, nasamajh naa samajh mujhe ... meri samajh teri samajh ke bahar hai ... samajhe?

Hoshiyaari toh hoshiyaar logon se ki jaati hai

Daal mein kaala ho ya garam masala ... kahan chup gaya hai saala?

Galati se galati ho gayi

Mera dushman toh paida hote hi phas jaate hai

Takleef humko ka takleef degi ... hum toh khud takleefon ko takleef de dete hai

Daal ke bataya nahi jaata ... aur bata ke daala nahi jaata

Aankhen hai toh dekh le, nahi khulega gate ... aur bahut bookha pyasa hai, toh kahin aur jaake kha chocolate

Madamji ko jeetne chale hai Dev Pratap ... saath hai Sanjeevani, khatam karenge paap

Akal shakal ke chakkar mein, jurm na ho sangeen ... hum toh mast vanar hai, kabhi na ho gangeen

Love marriage mein aadmi khud apni marzi se kuaye ke andhar jaata hai ... arranged marriage mein aadmi ka pura khandaan usko kuaye ke andhar dhakel deta hai ... lekin jaata toh kuaye mein hi hai

Joh jee nahi sakta hai tumhare without ... uspe tumko itna hai doubt

Khubsoorti se badkar kapda hota hai aur kapde se badkar nakhra hota hai

Priya jab assi saal ki ho jayegi na ... I promise you main tab bhi usko itna hi pyar karoonga ... dhoop mein iska chashma banuga, baarish mein iska chaata ... kyun ki pyar ke sivah mujhko kuch nahi aata

Kuch paane ke liye kuch khona padta hai ... aur joh nahi bhi ho, woh bhi hona padta hai

Meri girlfriend ke saath tu saiyaan banke, naiya ke upar, chaiyya chaiyya kare ... aur main UP ka bhaiya banke wahan kinare pe se haath hilaon

Mera sirf ek screw dheela hai ... baki sab tight hai

Tum jaisi biwiyan old case ho jaati na ... toh itna bhadakne lagti ... showcase mein rakhne layak nahi rehti

Sabak wafaa ka sikhaya bhi ja nahi sakta ... joh seekh lo toh bhulaya bhi ja nahi sakta .. yeh haseen dard dil mein chupaya bhi ja nahi sakta ... aur koi pooche toh bataya bhi ja nahi sakta

Tere baba ne kya diya mereku ... ek lota, ek thali, ek lungi woh bhi phateli, ek potti woh bhi hateli ... arre tu hamesha samajhti mujh ko kamina, hat ja kidhar hai meri Meena

Is chor bazaar mein aake apne ho gaye vare nyare ... apun akhiyon se goli maare

Kyun be sukhe hue chuare ... baasi udad ke papad!

Hospital mein chloroform ki jagah agar tere kapde soongah diye ja na ... toh patient coma mein chala jayega

Haath unhi ke jalte hai joh aag bhujane ki koshish karte hai ... aag jalane waalon ke haath kabhi nahi jalte