Jokes | चुटकुले

Bhikari : Saab Rs 6 de do coffee pina hai
Man : Kyon ek coffee to Rs 3 mein milti hai
Bhikari : Par saab sath me girl friend hai
Man : Bhikari ho kar girl friend banali
Bhikari : Nai saab, girl friend ne bhikari bana diya

Ek doctor k clinic k bahar lambi line lagi huithi.. Ek sardar bar bar line me ghusta aur log ose bahar phenk dete. Usney kaha agay raho salo mai bhi clinic nahi kholunga

One: Oye tera ek daant neela kyun ho gaya?

Two: Yaar maine ink lagayi hai.



One: Woh kyun.?

Two: Kyun ke aaj kal “bluetooth” ka zamana hai yaar…

Teacher: Sach aur veham mai kya fark hai?

Stud: Aap jo hum ko pahra rahy hain wo sach hai lekin hum parh rahy hain ye apka veham hai:-)

Santa:Mujhe phone par dhamkiya mil rahi hai.
Police: kaun woh?
Santa: BSNL wale, bolte hai bill nahi bhara to kaat denge

Maalik naukar se : Aaj tumane roti me jayada ghi laga diya hai.

Naukar : Galti ho gai maalik lagta hai mene aapko apni roti de di.

Man: Car Kyun Halki Ki?
Driver: Gear Badla Hai
Man: O Hram Khor Nikal Meri Car Se Meri Mojodgi Me Gear Badla Main Na Hota To Pori Car Bdal Deta

Ek operation ke bad patient bola-'Doctor saal kya ab me thik hu?' Jawab mila-'Doctor to neeche reh gaya mai to Chitragupt hu'

1st boss: Tumne us larki ko job Q nhi di?
2nd boss:Yr wo boht bewakuf thi
1st:Wo kese?
2nd:Kuch nhi bs jb maine usay bethne k liye kaha to wo chair dhundne lgi

Dukhi pappu bola: 'aisi zindgi se maut acchi'
Achanak Yamdut aaye bole: Tumhari jaan lene ka hukm hai.
Pappu Bola: Ye lo , ab insaan mazaak bhi nahi kar sakta

Pappu ne apni pregnant biwi ko Sms kiya 'Kaisi Ho ?'

Thodi der baad

Pappu zor-zor se nachne laga...
Kyoki uske mobile par msg aaya
'Mssg Delivered'

I've No Girlfriend



I've No Girl friend


I've No GirL Friend


I've No GirL Friend


Tum aPnay wA|i kA Number dE Do


Poori Das Ho jAin gI

Munnabhai: Circuit, Kutta kutte ko kaat ta hai, to wo injection kyo nahi leta hai.
Circuit: Simple hai bhai, Kutta hai bhai, wo bhi usko kaat leta hai.
haa haa haa

Teacher Mehnat Karo Ga
Tou Kuch Bano Ga .

Pathan Student Teacher Hamra
Gadha Tou Itni Mehnat Karta Hai

Magr Wo Kuch Nahe Bana ...;->

Santa: Mera bahut naam hai.
Banta: Wo kaise?
Santa: Bewakoof, tune wo gana nahi suna kya?
Banta: kaunsa?
Santa: Arey yaar,'Jiski Biwi Moti uska bhi bada naam hai'

''Ham na badlein gay waqt ki raftaar kay sath,,,
''Faraz''

Ham jab b milen gay hamari sabzi ka rate 1 he ho ga

Aalo 10rs kilo
Tamator 15rs
Muli 5 rs

Teacher- Apko Shahrukh Khan Ki Movie RAB NE BANA DI JODI Se Kya Lesson Mila?
Student- Ummeed Mat Haro, Shadi Ke Baad Bhi Ladki Pat Sakti He

Santa Police se:
Kal rat chor mere ghar se
TV ke Ilaaava sab samaan le gaye

Police:TV kyon nahi legaya??

Santa:TV to me dekh raha tha is liye

Judge: Y U've stolen money 4m dis man?
Santa: My lord I've nt stolen money. He jst gave it 2 me
Judge: Whn He gave U money ?
Santa: Whn I showd him gun ;->

Santa to policeman: Yeh har taraf kiyon likha hai: Gadi Dhire Chalao.

Policeman: Kiyon ki, Santa Ji, yahan duur duur tak koi hospital nahi hai.

zamindar: ager me subah apni car me niklu toh shaam taq me apni adhi zamin nahi deks sakta
santa:hamare paas bhi pele esi hi car thi

2 sardar were playing chess

1st - ab bas hua hum khel band karte hain

2nd - thik hai , vaise bhi tumhara ghora aur mera hathi he baki hai .

Sahab:
Tum bathroom mei q ghus aye,
kia tumhain pta nahi tha k main naha raha hoon?

Mulazim:
Hazur galti ho gai,
main samjha tha begum sahiba naha rahi hain;-)

Santa: o yar!
Me kal film dekhne theater gaya!
Wahan such much admi ko kat rahe thy
Banta: o tu konse theater gaya tha?
Santa:
“Operation Theatre”

Boy:Darling Hamare pyar ke
bare mein kisi ko mat batana.


Girl: Sana ko to zaroor bataungi,
kehti thi kaun paagal hoga
jo tujhse pyar karega

Rahul Gandhi apni maa soniyaji se - Mom, Aapki Vajah se meri shaadi Nahi ho rahi.
Sonia - Kyun ?
Rahul - Har Taraf Likha Hai Soniajiko Bahumatdo.(Bahu MatDo)

Husband 2 Wife : Did u Have any boyfriend before marriage?

Wife remains silent

Husband : Mai is Khamoshi ko kya samjhu ??

Wife : Abbe gin ne to De

My no. is changd. Plz note my New no. is 100, plz call me 2 comfrm. Mera naukar uthaye to 2-4 galiya de dena. Bada kamina hai, apne aap ko Police kehta hai....

Premika-Me maa banne wali hu!!
Premi-R u mad?
KAHANI ME TWIST:
Premika-Bakvas nhi,me tumhare baap se shadi karke tumari maa banne wali hu

Ek Family SHOLAY Dekh KE Aayi,
Aur Pati Patni Se Romantically Bola,
'Nach Bsanti Nach.' Child added:
'Mummy! is kutte Ke Samne Mat Nachna.

1st Man:Janab Lagta Hy Menay Apka

Chehra Pehlay Bhi Kahin Dekha Hy

2nd Man:Ap Ko Glat Fehmi Hui HY Main Hr

Wqt Apna Chehra Sath Liay Phrta Hon.

Kaunsi devi ka kaunsa prasad India main famous hai?
RAABDI DEVI ka LALU PRASHAD.